Episode 132 Shut your trap and eat
Many of the commandos in this group had seen Tian Yuan. When the hospital was hijacked, they were dispatched. Tian Yuan treated Pan Lei after he lied about needing to be hospitalized. As a result, Tian Yuan noticed a few familiar faces but had no idea what they were called and smiled at them, eliciting wolf-whistles.
"Doctor Tian has always been gentle and elegant. His getting together with our Devil Squadron Leader Pan is such a waste."
Someone uttered such sentiments ruefully, and then someone else smacked him on the back of the head and tore into him.
"Don't you notice how attentive our Squadron Leader is to him? Squadron Leader Pan will make you coil your belly around a flagpole a thousand times if you spew rubbish again."
Pan Lei was busy peeling and slicing an apple he'd picked before presenting it to Tian Yuan at the time. After that, he split an orange into little segments. He shoved a paper towel into Doctor Tian's hand as well. Tian Yuan was seated and eating fruit honestly.
Pan Lei and Tian Yuan sat next to one other. Pan Lei was deep in conversation with one of his deputy instructors and was not looking at Tian Yuan. However, when Tian Yuan dropped a piece of fruit, Pan Lei drew him away to prevent him from subconsciously searching for it.
"Eat these instead of looking for that piece."
Tian Yuan hummed in acknowledgement and continued to eat instead of searching for the dropped fruit all over the floor. He took a bite from one of the apple pieces. Pan Lei snatched the apple slice and shoved it into his mouth without even looking at him.
Tian Yuan offered him the fruit right away, holding the plate in front of him. Pan Lei, however, shook his head. He didn't actually want to eat it. He'd just wanted to eat the piece Tian Yuan had bitten. {T/N: Critical hit💘}
After finishing the day's training, the entire squadron had gathered to eat fruit and talk. Many people noticed their little intimate actions - Tian Yuan eating fruit earnestly with his head lowered, while Pan Lei chatted with the deputy instructor with a half-turned neck. They were unconcerned about how many eyes were on them.
Pan Lei took out a pack of cigarettes and tossed it on the table. The deputy instructor took it and lit one. Pan Lei also had a cigarette in his mouth and patted all his pockets for a lighter, but he couldn't find one.
"Tian’er."
Gang Leader Pan Lei raised his chin and gazed at Tian Yuan. Tian Yuan immediately took out the newly bought lighter and lit it for him.
It's unclear if Pan Lei's eyes were bent because he was smiling or because of the increasing smoke. He grasped Tian Yuan's hand and continued speaking with the deputy instructor.
The deputy instructor walked away after a couple of puffs. Pan Lei cocked his head and removed the cigarette from his mouth.
"You want it?"
Tian Yuan gave a nod. He smoked as well, although not as much as Pan Lei. Pan Lei sent the cigarette he had just smoked to Tian Yuan's mouth just as he was going to reach for a lighter. Tian Yuan grabbed his wrist and took a puff.
Pan Lei kissed him on the cheek.
"Smoke less, you're not in shape. Let's go get something to eat. Let me tell you, the cafeteria in the commando barracks has the tastiest food in the entire military district."
He tossed the cigarette butt into the trash can and led Tian Yuan to the cafeteria.
"Don't you need to take a rice bowl?"
"Huh, you think this is your hospital cafeteria? You don't need a rice bowl. Ordinary troops are the only ones who use their own rice bowls. I'll show you around after supper to help you digest the food. Then we'll go to our room and rest."
Tian Yuan was a little excited. Would he get to see the plot played on TV? All the soldiers carrying rice bowls and singing a song outside the canteen before dinner, their voices loud and resonant?
Pan Lei claimed that every soldier could sing, that every soldier had a very good voice, that the songs they sang were nice to listen to, and that every soldier was a mic hog.
The deputy instructors were gathering soldiers who had formed two lines and were standing at the cafeteria's door.
Pan Lei escorted him to the cafeteria.
"There really is a song before dinner! What will they be singing?"
Tian Yuan had never seen anything like this before. He turned his neck and looked back. They were all gathered to sing a song. Why isn't Pan Lei joining?
Pan Lei walked over to get a tray, explaining, "Yes, singing is compulsory. But, let me tell you, songs before a meal are quite brief. Nobody wants to sing the eight major disciplines[1] on an empty stomach. When the singing is finished, all of the food will be devoured in a flash. Just observe if you don’t believe me."
This was a minor custom in the barracks. A song before a meal must be short and couldn’t cause the meal to be delayed.
They chose the simple "Learn from Lei Feng’s good example[2]" and began to sing.
Tian Yuan remained motionless while he listened. They are truly singing! Holding a rice bowl and singing loudly in resonant, clear voices... Won’t they be even hungrier?
"Come on, pick what you want to eat. Don’t look at them. Eat. Come quickly."
Pan Lei turned around to see his family's hubby standing in the middle of the canteen like a rookie, watching them sing with interest. This was not a singing star's concert, yet he was so engrossed in it that he forgot to eat. Don't stare at them. If you gaze any longer, this gang of soldiers will be embarrassed.
Pan Lei dragged him away. The cafeteria’s head chef was wearing a chef's hat. He was chubby and charming.
"Squadron Leader Pan, this is..."
"My love, he’s come to see me. What’s delicious? He’s a picky eater."
The head chef was stunned for a moment, then laughed.
"I stewed meat today. Would you like to eat it?"
"Make some pork chops tomorrow. He enjoys eating that. Forget it. You can buy the ribs and I will prepare them for him. Tian'er, do you want to eat some Chinese cabbage? Today's cabbage tofu is quite tasty."
Tian Yuan’s head was turned as he was still busy watching those soldiers sing. He was not thinking about food at all.
"Don't wanna. I’m not a rabbit."
Pan Lei felt powerless.
"How about taking some extra meat?"
"Pork or beef?"
Tian Yuan was still watching the singing performance. Pan Lei always arranged his food for him so he didn't have to worry about it. What piqued his interest the most at this point was the singing soldiers. They haven’t finished singing yet. Aren’t they hungry? Bao chui e chang[3], huh. Finish quickly and have dinner.
"Pork."
"Then I will eat."
The singing was finally finished. Tian Yuan looked ahead when he saw them walking in one after another.
"Oh! The cabbage tofu looks delicious. Pan Lei, don't keep taking meat. You should eat a well-balanced diet." {T/N: lol}
Pan Lei wished he could scold him. I asked whether you wanted to eat it a moment ago. He really couldn’t do anything about this little ancestor. He placed two bowls of rice and three steamed buns on one tray.
"Go, go, and take a seat at that table. I’ll grab the rest of it for you. You’re making trouble here."
He couldn’t let Tian Yuan pick and choose at his leisure. The soldiers in line behind them were hungry. They needed to move quickly.
Pan Lei remembered Tian Yuan disliked steamed buns shortly after he sat down. So he pushed the rice in front of him and added several pieces of tender pork belly as well as some cabbage. Tian Yuan began to devour it.
"Tastes good, right. He’s a first-class chef. When the commander of the military district feels greedy he eats here. Isn't it delicious?"
"It’s not as delicious as your cooking. I still enjoy your ribs."
Pan Lei added some vegetables to Tian Yuan’s bowl.
"I'll cook it for you tomorrow."
He could meet all of his needs as long as he was at his side. He wouldn't think twice about putting on an apron over his military uniform and entering the kitchen to cook for Tian Yuan, ruining his steadfastly aggressive and powerful image.
They were surrounded by two of his deputy instructors. Pan Lei cast them a sidelong glance.
"White Head, Flat Head, 3000 push-ups done?"
"Done. We only came to eat after we were done. This is Dr. Tian. I've known your name for a long time. It's great that you’re here. You have no idea how ruthless Squadron Leader Pan is, how mercilessly he trains and punishes. Does he train you like that at home? He’s so bad tempered; how did you get together with him?"
Pan Lei gave them a supercilious look.
"Do we have to inform you about our family matters or about how we get along? Don't think for a second that I forgot you were listening in on us. You’d better stay away. You want to eavesdrop on Laozi’s intimacy with my family’s hubby?! Don’t you know he is thin-skinned?! You’ll scare him. If he doesn’t let me sleep with him, I won’t let you guys sleep."
Tian Yuan raised his head and gave him a look. How could he possibly say such things?
"Aren't you guys also men? You're married, White Head. Do we listen in on you when your wife comes to visit? We only recently received consent from our parents and are currently in the honeymoon phase. Intimacy between lovers after a short absence is sweeter to that of newlyweds. Can you handle what we will be doing? Why are you gossiping so much? Have you formed an alliance with the logistics department? Can't you think about me? We're newlyweds, ah."
Tian Yuan placed a steamed bun into Pan Lei's palm, forcing himself to smile despite his eyes shooting daggers. Stop talking nonsense. Will it kill you to eat quietly?
"But we’re very curious about how you get along with your husband. How can you, a bad tempered fire-breathing dinosaur, fall in love? How can someone fall in love with you?"
The expression on White Head's face was extremely gossipy. White Head was actually young. Because he was a deputy instructor, he was referred to as "Leader," but because there were other deputy instructors, they were distinguished by their surnames.[4]
"Not just love, he’s madly in love with me. We have a great relationship. He’s my boss, my family’s treasure, my love, and he’s also the cream of the crop. Don’t irritate him. I’ll come looking for you if he pulls a long face at me."
Pan Lei was multitasking by grasping Tian Yuan's hand and dropping a flurry of kisses on it, wanting to show off in front of White Head.
"Feel free to envy and admire me, ah. My darling can visit me, accompany me for forty days, we can linger deeply and use our bodies to prove how loving we are~ are you upset?"
Tian Yuan abruptly removed his hand from Pan Lei's grasp, replacing it with a steamed bun.
"Eat."
Tian Yuan gritted his teeth and spit out this word, wishing he could bite him to death. He gave Pan Lei a lot of face in front of his soldiers, but he forgot that Pan Lei didn’t have face! Why the hell was he constantly showing off? Was this something to brag about?! He needs to be spanked!
"I’ve got buns. Don't keep giving me buns. Just focus on dinner."
Tian Yuan was so furious that he nearly broke his chopsticks. Idiot, this idiot, this all brawn no brains idiot, has no idea what I mean when I hand him a bun and urge him to eat. Tian Yuan wanted to give him enough face, but he was so dull that he didn't even realize it.
"I handed you a bun and told you to eat it because I wanted to use it to block your mouth. You're uttering rubbish over and over. Shut your trap and eat. If you say anything else, I’ll leave right away."
The steamed bun can't shut your mouth, right? Let’s see if these words can do the trick.
The deputy instructor erupted in laughter when he saw Pan Lie ate obediently after being glared at by Tian Yuan. Everything has a weakness, and there was someone that Squadron Leader Pan couldn't manage.
Pan Lei's teeth were clenched with rage. When it came to his baby, he was helpless, but he could deal with White Head.
Pan Lei’s hand was a blur as he pressed White Head’s face into the bowl in front of him. White Head’s face was smeared with a sticky mixture of greens and rice grains soaked in pork sauce.
Pan Lei grinned at Tian Yuan.
"Baby, let's eat."
Eat my foot! Could he have an appetite in front of someone whose face was caked in sludge?
Footnotes:
[1] This refers to the Three Rules of Discipline and Eight Points for Attention. It is the People's Liberation Army military discipline. For those interested, the three disciplines are: 1. All actions are subject to command. 2. Don't take the masses one by one. 3.All seizures must go to the public. The eight points are: Speak kindly; Fair trade; Borrowed things must be returned; Compensate if you damage things; Do not hit or scold others; Do not damage the crops; Do not molest women; Do not abuse captives.
[2] A song composed by Sheng Mao and Wu Hongyuan. The song was composed in 1963 and was first sung by the Beijing Military Art Troupe. Lei Feng was allegedly a soldier in the People's Liberation Army who was the object of several major propaganda campaigns in China. The most well known of these campaigns in 1963 promoted the slogan, "Follow the examples of Comrade Lei Feng." Lei was portrayed as a model citizen, and the masses were encouraged to emulate his selflessness, modesty, and devotion to Mao.
[3] Folk saying which means people who play musical instruments need full stomachs, while those who sing need an empty stomach.
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