Chapter 93 Uncle, is this my aunt?
Tian Yuan had a pleasant demeanor. His ‘violence’ towards Pan Lei was the result of his rage at Pan Lei. To be honest, it was because Pan Lei spoiled him. He was usually polite, modest, cordial, and conciliatory in social situations. All of his petty tantrums were directed towards Pan Lei. Naturally, he preserved the most flawless side in front of his mother-in-law. Everyone admires nice people, especially those who smile.
After reacting to his mother-in-law’s words, Tian Yuan was acknowledged as "the most excellent son-in-law" by the family. The more Dean Dang Hong looked at him, the more she liked him. She became increasingly sure that this man was exceptional and had been ruined by her bandit son.
He was an excellent surgeon who, like most doctors, was morally upright. He possessed all the qualities of a great catch. He would never have fallen into Pan Lei's clutches if he were a woman.
The entire Pan family laughed at Tian Yuan's "mother." Pan Lei stepped over and boldly hugged Tian Yuan's shoulders.
"Mom, the daughter-in-law that I found for you is the best. Are you satisfied?"
"Satisfied, extremely satisfied. He’s a good kid. You must treat him well in the future."
There are no flaws whatsoever. My son truly has the greatest vision.
Daughter-in-law? Tian Yuan snuck his hand up to Pan Lei’s waist and pinched him fiercely.
Pan Lei screamed.
"Are you f**king pinching me?"
He acted smart, attempting to use his family’s strength against Tian’er, believing that with so many people on his side, he could be unscrupulous. He rubbed his waist with a complaining expression.
"What's wrong with pinching you? Can't I?"
"Okay, okay, ancestor, with so many people around, could you spare me a little face? If you want to pinch me, you can do so whenever you want when we get home."
He lowered his voice and pleaded for mercy in Tian Yuan's ear, begging for him to save some face because all the elders were present.
"Wife slave."
Pan Zhan flatly spurned.
"Oh? So you're not a wife slave? Don't mock me! You’re not any better!"
Pan Lei retorted. His eldest brother was well-known for his devotion to his wife. When the pair clashed and his wife raised a commotion, he never dared to retaliate. Wasn't this the case of the pot calling the kettle black? What was he so complacent about?
"He is afraid of me because he loves me. Why do you care?"
Sister-in-law Pan stood up and clamored with Pan Lei on Pan Zhan’s behalf.
"I am willing to be pinched by him. It is a little bit of fun between us lovers. Why do you care?"
The brother-in-law and sister-in-law got into an argument on the sofa. For the elders, it was routine. When the family got together, the younger generation would always argue like this.
Sister Pan had a fiery temper. She dashed over, eager to battle Pan Lei once more. Pan Lei was unfazed by her. She couldn't beat him no matter how hard she tried. He would have taught her a lesson if it hadn't been for the protection of his Eldest Brother.
Tian Yuan frowned. He couldn’t ignore the fight between the two.
He cleared his throat.
"Pan Lei."
He yelled in hushed tones. Pan Lei, the tamed tiger, was pushing up his sleeves ready for a fight when he suddenly turned into a kitten.
"Humph! I’ll listen to my hubby. Gentlemen don’t fight with women."
The rolled-up sleeves went down, and he obediently returned to Tian Yuan. Tian Yuan nodded his head. Very well-behaved.
Grandpa Pan burst out laughing.
"Oh? Everything truly has a weakness! Leizi has been a rogue since he was a child. He’ll be obedient now that Xiao Tian is here. That’s good. As they say, a man will not experience misfortune if he has a good woman at home."
"Grandpa, Tian'er is also a man. He dislikes being addressed as wife or daughter-in-law. Since he doesn't like it, I'm also not happy."
Before Tian Yuan could even grimace, he refuted his grandfather's characterization of him as a good wife. Tian Yuan would still pinch him for being disrespectful.
The old lady gave the old guy a stern look.
"Why didn’t you inform us sooner? Xiao Tian, you are our good grandson."
"Okay, stop making trouble. It’s time to eat. Leizi, take Tian Yuan to freshen up. Show him the way to the dining room."
Dang Hong hurriedly summoned everyone to the table. They had important things to do after the meal.
Pan Lei dragged Tian Yuan to the bathroom, caging him between the sink and his body. He turned on the faucet, continuously caressed Tian Yuan's hands, and took advantage of the opportunity to press his head against Tian Yuan's shoulders, tilting his head sideways to kiss Tian Yuan's neck.
"I like your family."
Tian Yuan whispered his confession. Despite the fact that Pan Lei’s pestering to meet his family had made him feel pressured, this pressure catalyzed a family’s happiness and warmth. His parents were caring, his grandparents were gentle, and his uncles and brothers were kind. This display of intense affection made him like them a lot. It was unfortunate that this family was a little unreasonable.
"They like you, too, baby. I'm pleased you like them as well. We are a family. You accepted both myself and my parents. We're a real pair from now on. We'll have minor squabbles and arguments, but we'll be quite happy. Your parents are also my parents, just as my parents are your parents. Just like for straight men and women, our marriage is the union of two people and the fusion of two families. Darling, you have no idea how delighted I am to see you happily conversing with my mother. I am extremely satisfied since my love and my beloved mother get along like mother and son.”
Love was a matter between two people. However, if these two people were to be together, it was a matter of two families. Introducing your lover to your parents was motivated by a desire to be blessed and acknowledged. All comrades[1] wanted to introduce their partner to their parents, but there was too much societal pressure and misunderstandings that made them shy away. They didn’t want their parents to be upset, so they could only wrong themselves.
But this couple was unique. Although Pan Lei’s family was powerful, he had already dealt with everything. The method had been absurd and high-profile, but it had undoubtedly paved the way for Tian Yuan to enter the door. It shielded Tian Yuan from even the faintest suggestion of contempt, derision, or harm. This was also a way Pan Lei showed his love.
Tian Yuan turned around to embrace Pan Lei. He was wedged between the sink and Pan Lei, practically sticking together. They were both unconcerned about their dripping wet hands.
Pan Lei kissed him and held him.
"Me too."
Tian Yuan mumbled. I am overjoyed that you have enlightened parents and a loving family. Thank you for sharing your parents and family with me. Thank you for letting me be a part of it and enjoy your parents’ love and the warmth of family with you.
Pan Lei’s kisses were not fierce, but rather lingering.
Tian Yuan smiled as he teased him with pecking kisses. That's when he invaded, kissing him passionately. He wrapped his arms around Tian Yuan’s waist, and hoisted him so that just his toes were touching the ground. Tian Yuan could only tighten his grip on Pan Lei’s neck. As they kissed, their bodies became entwined.
"Uncle, uncle, third grandma[a] asked that I call you to eat."
The little girl knocked on the door untimely, and kept hitting the door. Pan Lei bit Tian Yuan's neck with reluctance.
"This proves I can't raise a child. Right now, all I want to do is grab her and throw her out on the street. Baby, I’ll support you instead and consider you my son."
Pan Lei's words utterly destroyed the romantic ambiance created by the long and gently lingering kisses. Tian Yuan couldn't take it anymore. This jerk! How did he become his son all of a sudden?
With the new strawberry mark on his neck, he lifted his foot to kick Pan Lei's leg, glared at him, and opened the door.
He knelt down and scooped up Pan Zhan's daughter.
"Can you tell me your name, little darling?"
He knew the names of the big figures in the Pan family, but he still didn’t know much about others.
"Pan Shiji[2]. My nickname is Ling Si'er."
When the little girl smiled, her two missing front teeth were visible. She was at the age of losing baby teeth. It looked a bit funny. Her hair was styled with two bows. The girl had inherited her mother's legacy. She was lovely and exuded the unmistakable Wonder Woman aura.
Tian Yuan stumbled and nearly fell. He gaped at the little girl who was beaming like a flower.
Pan Shiji? Her father's nickname was Po[3]si'er, so his daughter's nickname became Ling Si[4]'er? Was this also an inheritance?
Who came up with this name? It… it was… too awesome, okay? It was enough to leave everyone stunned.
Pan Lei wrapped his hand around Tian Yuan’s waist and walked towards the dining room. Naturally, he was used to it.
"She was born in the new century, which is very commemorative, so she is called Shiji. As it happened, she was born in 2004, so her nickname also followed her father's, and she was called Ling Si'er. Although she is the family's eldest granddaughter, we all call her son. When her father hears it, his face stiffens."
Tian Yuan gazed at the child, thought about Pan Zhan, and finally looked at Pan Lei.
"Your name is much more appealing."
Pan Lei was overjoyed and kissed Tian Yuan in front of the little girl. Even though he was chastised for being brainless, he enjoyed listening to it.
"Don't play around. Be careful of teaching her bad things."
Who would have guessed that Ling Si'er was fearless? She stared at them with two big watery eyes, as adorable as Bambi. What horrible individual gave her that outrageous name?
"Uncle, my father said, this uncle is your lover. Are you going to get married?"
The little girl, with her large Bambi eyes, voiced a naïve question in her childish innocence.
"Yes, as long as he agrees, we'll marry, and Ling Si'er will surely be a flower girl for her uncle?"
Pan Lei stroked the child's hair. He couldn't rear children, but that didn't mean he despised them. He was quite good at playing with other people's children.
Ling Si'er heard something intriguing and bounced in Tian Yuan’s arms, asking excitedly, "Then, uncle, he is my aunt, right?"
Such a sweet child - How come she questioned as if she were a little devil?
"Auntie, I’ll call you auntie. Shouldn’t you give Ling Si’er a red envelope?"
Tian Yuan glanced at Ling Si'er's innocent eyes and wanted to tell her that if she had wings, she could fool everyone into thinking she was an angel. However, the Pan family did not have angels. The Pan family was a wacky bunch of jerks. From the old to the young, they were all different kinds of crazy.
Pan Lei grinned, thinking Ling Si'er was too cute. Tian Yuan’s expression as he stared at her was even cuter. He was stumped by the question of who was more adorable.
Pan Lei took out his wallet, counted 500 mint one yuan notes, presented them to Ling Si’er, and said pompously.
"Honey, buy yourself some candy, okay?"
Footnotes:
[1] Homosexual in slang.
[2] Century.
[3] Po means broken.
[4] Ling means zero or naught. Si means four. So the nickname is “No four”.
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