Chapter 224 Wedding preparations
Tian Yuan sat like a docile kitten in Pan Lei's arms, carefully and steadily patting his back. When Pan Lei said this, Tian Yuan's consoling hand quickly changed into a fist.
He slammed his fist into Pan Lei's back.
"Damn you! There is never a time when you don't play tricks on me."
It was great news, but Pan Lei was dishonest and duped him into thinking there was something wrong. Punching him was giving him a free pass; he deserved a kick.
"You’re so unreasonable. Why are you beating me up when I only wanted to give you a nice surprise? Don't beat me up all day after we marry."
Tian Yuan didn't bother looking at him.
"Don't tie the knot if you are scared of being beaten. I don't care."
Pan Lei rubbed against Tian Yuan and smiled shyly.
"I’m perfectly happy to take your beating. Just see how I stomp them to death if anyone tries to replace me. We have to get married, baby. You cannot back out and refuse to marry me at this time. Then I'll become Mr. NobodyWantsMe. The bride foolishly waited at home on the wedding day, but Sina[1] did not appear. You have to come fetch me and save me some face."
Tian Yuan smacked him.
"Joker! I'm hungry, so go cook."
"Roger!"
Pan Lei removed his coat, put on his apron, and walked back and forth in the kitchen as he cooked, his tie tucked into his shirt pocket and his trousers well-ironed.
Tian Yuan leaned against the door frame and smiled at him. It was all outside, regardless of whether he was promoted or rendered exemplary service. He wore an apron and cooked for him when he entered the house. He was dressed in a military uniform and was peeling onions one minute and stir-frying the next. Isn't he a busy little bee? He hummed a ditty while cooking. The battlefield was his domain, as was the training ground, and so was the kitchen. This guy is willing to go to any length for me.
Tian Yuan patted his pockets, took out a cigarette, lighted it, and leaned against the doorframe, and kept watching Pan Lei. He enjoyed gazing at Pan Lei like this now, and he liked to see Pan Lei rush about for his sake. Why was he filled with the pleasure that comes from seeing your wifey bustling in the kitchen?
This tall and strong beefy wifey of his tormented him in the middle of the night. Tian Yuan laughed quietly to himself. Pan Lei, too, desired a drag and pouted at him.
Tian Yuan examined the cigarette in his hand, half of which had already been smoked. He simply took out a new one and held it to Pan Lei's lips before flipping open the lighter.
Pan Lei took hold of his jaw and lifted it up. And just like this, Pan Lei raised Tian Yuan's chin up and dropped his head while holding the cigarette in his lips. He cocked his neck and leaned in, as if he intended to kiss Tian Yuan like he had thousands of times before. But he didn't kiss him this time. Rather, he touched the unlit cigarette end to the cigarette Tian Yuan was holding in his mouth, held it steady, and lit it with two puffs.
Pan Lei smiled as he narrowed his eyes. His moves were akin to kissing, giving him the impression that he was taunting Tian Yuan. Pan Lei couldn't help but kiss Tian Yuan’s forehead as he watched him wait foolishly.
Tian Yuan grinned and narrowed his gaze before dropping the cigarette in his hand and pulling out another. He cocked his head and approached, as if he intended to kiss Pan Lei, and asked for a light in this method as well.
"Stop smoking. If you smoke too much, you will feel sick and lose your appetite. Go feed Jindou’er, or take him for a walk."
Tian Yuan didn't want to. Their family's Jindou'er, their son, was a truly magical dog.
An obnoxious dog with limitless potential.
Jindou'er liked to pee on slippers, which caused Tian Yuan a lot of pain. His feet were smeared with dog poop when he put his sneakers on. Pan Lei had admonished it several times. Jindou'er was extremely obedient. It stopped peeing on the slippers and started raining on the sofa legs.
When Pan Lei caught it doing this, he slapped it a few times and then led it to the toilet, where he placed a basin of cat litter and trained it to do its business.
Unfortunately, Jindou’er still liked to pee on the sofa.
Tian Yuan was dumbfounded and unsure how to deal with the situation. He raised his hand to slap it a couple times, but it looked so pitiful that he couldn't. But simply looking on every time it lifted its dog leg to pee on the sofa leg was not an option. Peeing there was far too unsanitary.
Pan Lei had no alternative but to lock it in the toilet after each piss session and let it sprinkle on the cat litter once more.
Jindou'er then altered its behavior.
It marked the sofa leg with half of its urine and then raced to the toilet by itself to pee on the cat litter with the other half.
Tian Yuan laughed and rolled all over the bed.
Pan Lei was awfully depressed as a result of this. This was the outcome of several attempts at discipline.
They began to keep track of the time. The dog had a biological clock as well. When the time was up, they took it downstairs for a walk and let it pee under the trees in the neighborhood, fertilizing the flowers and trees in the process.
In fact, it was getting close to time. Pan Lei threw him a coat as Tian Yuan opened the door and prepared to take Jindou'er for a walk.
Jindou'er, this little brat, had a terrific time every time it went downstairs. Tian Yuan had no choice but to wait for it to spray the flower bed.
Tian Yuan was bored to death as he watched Jindou'er hide here and there, and he reflected that this puppy had grown up, and it was no longer a small dog, but a medium-sized dog. Its fur had become glossy with proper care, and the golden fur was beautiful as it shone like satin in the sunlight.
"What’s with this expression? It’s like watching your dear son leave for college."
Tian Yuan raised his head and noticed Zhang Hui. Zhang Hui was also a fairly handsome guy, and he looked great with his back to the sun and a smile.
"What brings you here? You've arrived just in time. He's cooking, so let's have a meal together before you go."
Zhang Hui sat next to him, handing him a stack of papers.
"Isn't the date fast approaching? I've completed the seating arrangements and brought them here for you to see. You can also check out the banquet dishes. We can adjust anything if it doesn't suit you."
The couple was recuperating at home and living a tranquil life, but this gang of brothers was going insane assisting them with everything. Huang Kai, who was organizing the car fleet, called him and asked if he wanted a Rolls-Royce Phantom, a Cayenne, or a Ferrari sports car as the wedding car.
Lin Mu inquired about the assignment of the best men. Would they wait for Tian Yuan in Leizi's house, or would they accompany Tian Yuan as he took Pan Lei to the wedding?
The banquet was overseen by Zhang Hui.
The arm-flinging shopkeeper[2] couple’s work was particularly comfortable.
Tian Yuan perused the file. Most of the people on the guest list he didn't know, and just looking at their military ranks gave him a headache. This was going to be a big spectacle with so many major generals, COs, and lieutenant generals gathered in one spot. Don't they think it's a bit awkward to attend the wedding of two men? This bunch of folks impressed him.
"I'm preparing for around 8,000 guests and setting more than 80 tables. It's a conservative estimate, so I'll arrange more. I heard that everyone from the special forces is expected to attend. The scene will be lively."
Yeah, really lively; like an armed rebellion.
"I don't understand this. You can show it to my mother-in-law. I'll be in charge of getting him to the venue that day, and I don't care about the rest."
"You can simply count the red envelopes after the wedding."
They had no idea when Pan Lei arrived downstairs. When he heard Pan Lei's greeting, Zhang Hui laughed. This money grubber.
While the two of them talked, Tian Yuan glanced through the file. When Zhang Hui learned about Pan Lei's promotion, he hit him and whooped, proclaiming Pan Lei to be the finest in their friend circle. Pan Lei now held the highest military rank among all the children from the military compound.
Tian Yuan noticed that Xiaji's name was on Lin Mu and Zhang Hui's table, which was odd.
But because this had been organized by Zhang Hui, he couldn't say much. Tian Yuan was gobsmacked when he saw Pan Yue’s name.
He pointed at Pan Yue's name, stunned. Did this brave black rose really wish to return?
"Oh, my sister has been asking about our wedding date for the past two days. She confirmed yesterday that she will return (to China)."
Tian Yuan was about to cry.
"Can I call off the wedding now? She's coming? She’ll definitely mess up the wedding ceremony."
Zhang Hui erupted with laughter.
"Leizi's paternal aunt will be there as well. This sister is terrified of her mother. She will undoubtedly be on her best behavior with his aunt present."
Tian Yuan was yearning to express: Isn't it okay not to marry? It's great to live like this. Isn't bringing that fairy back just asking for trouble?
He didn't expect a romantic wedding, nor did he desire a dream wedding. He wanted a safe and secure wedding. It would be terribly awkward to lose face in front of so many people.
"Laoniang** will be your maid of honor, younger sis-in-law. I'll hold the window open for you. If that a$$hole Pan Lei dares to bully you, I will help you out."
Pan Yue dialed Tian Yuan's phone number urgently.
Tian Yuan's head hurt.
"Big sis, the two of us are fantastic. You don't have to especially come here if you're too busy."
"What nonsense! Laoniang must attend. My mother has prepared a gown for me. I’ve never been a bridesmaid before. I have to be your bridesmaid. I'll get off the phone and go get a ticket. I'll be back in town the day before your wedding."
Tian Yuan groaned and rested his chin on Pan Lei's shoulder. They'd entertained Zhang Hui for supper, who didn't insist on courtesy and left after a good time. Tian Yuan got a headache when their tough elder sister called.
"Let's elope."
When Tian Yuan blurted out these words, Pan Lei burst out laughing, hugged him, and kissed him numerous times.
"You’re so scared of her attending the wedding? She was just joking with you. She told me she really liked you when we were together in the UK. She would have pursued you if you weren't mine. Don't worry, everything will be OK. She may be tough, but she is not reckless; she is prudent."
"It's enough for both families to share a meal. Why do you have to make it such a public event?"
"I can't wrong you. This marriage must take place. I want your family, my family, and all of our relatives and friends to come and bless us and know we're a couple. Provide data and facts to back it up."
"You just want to play crazy. By the way, my parents are flying in tomorrow, so we need to meet them at the airport. I can't believe I got sucked in by a man like you and am now marrying you. It will be the burial of love and the funeral of marriage five days later."
"You’re talking nonsense again. Do you think I won’t clean you up? Don’t tell me my darling has a marriage phobia. I will be this good to you even after sixty years. Trust me on this. My love for you is like the waters of the Yellow River, flowing endlessly."
Tian Yuan kicked him.
"You’re clowning here; I won't marry you."
This sentence was a new threatening phrase: "I won't marry you." Pan Lei always obeyed right away.
"If you don't marry me, I will marry you. It’s the same thing."
Footnotes:
[1] Sina is a media company, and I'm not sure why the author used it in this context. Sina should be the groom...
[2] An arm-flinging shopkeeper is a metaphor for somebody who asks others to work but does nothing himself.
** Laoniang=this old lady. Arrogant way of referring to oneself; female equivalent of laozi.
Translator:
The cigarette kiss part was fantastic. I could totally picture the scene in my brain, and it was adorable. Looking each other in the eyes...kyaa!😍
Jindou’er is PL’s son. No doubt about it😆
Right? Lol my brain said oh that’s a spicy image right there sharing cigarette to light them
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